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heya...

i don't envy you.
well, maybe i do.
it's just that it hurts me that you can't open up to me.
me of all people.
i have to squeeze it out from you.
whatever it is that you're holding back from me,
i feel it in my heart...
even if you don't say it, or even if
you disguise it with a flat denial.
i thought we were going to be close
about such matters.
but then you choose to run away so fast.
so fast you didn't care to tell me that you're leaving.
yes, i am happy for you.
why do you keep saying i shouldn't be?
i don't understand your shit.
what you have right now is something i might never have at all.
because i just feel it in my heart.
but you running away like that, is something
that breaks my heart even more.

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